Parshas Ki Savo

There is a verse in this week’s Torah portion, Parshas Ki Savo, that stops you cold when you think about it carefully. “Because you did not serve Hashem your God with joy and gladness over the abundance of everything.” Devarim 28:47. The curses described in this portion are among the most severe in the entire Torah, and one of their triggers is not failing to do mitzvos, but failing to do them with joy. Which raises an obvious question. Why does it matter how I feel as long as I do the right thing?

Rabbeinu Bachya explains that joy when performing a mitzvah is not merely a nice addition. It is itself a commandment, meriting its own reward and its own consequence when absent. And while fulfilling the commandment itself is in and of itself a great thing, the joy and wholehearted intention behind it  transforms it into something categorically greater. Mitzvos are not transactions. They are expressions of a relationship with Hashem. And like any relationship, what you bring emotionally to the moment changes the nature of the encounter entirely.

But this raises a real question. What about the mitzvos that demand sadness? Tisha Bav requires us to mourn the destruction of the Beis Hamikdash. Shiva demands seven days of grief. Are these not direct contradictions of the obligation to serve Hashem with joy?

The answer is that joy in this context is not about mood. It is about connection. Think of a person who weeps on the shoulder of someone they love during a moment of tremendous loss. The crying is not a failure of the relationship. It is one of its deepest expressions. You can only truly grieve with someone you are genuinely close to. Tisha Bav and shiva are not absences of simcha. They are connection expressed through grief, which is itself one of the most profound forms of relationship possible.

Hashem gives us the remarkable ability to bring our whole selves, including our pain, our loss, and our sadness, into our relationship with Him. That itself is the gift.

May Hashem help us serve Him with full hearts in every season, and in that merit may He shower us and all of Klal Yisrael with joy, blessing, and closeness to Him.